Thursday, 26 August 2010

The long stay

I am posting from my iPhone! So this won't be a long post. Just to say I have been in hospital since last Thursday! I won't go into the gory details here. Suffice to say there is unstoppable ( at the moment!) bleeding going on. So I am having lots of care and transfusions, and staying in Cumbria until next Tuesday. I will then be taken to London in an ambulance on Tuesday! That's 200 miles folks! From next week the Royal Marsden will look after me. I am being well looked after and will blog when I can. Xx

Wednesday, 18 August 2010

The second opinion

Since my local hospital had told me that my tumour was inoperable and incurable I came to the decision that I needed a second opinion. It may sound odd, but I did not come to this conclusion quickly or easily. I suppose I have been in shock.
My GP suggested I go the Royal Marsden, a cancer hospital in London with a wonderful reputation. It is a long way to go, but worth every mile.
I have been three times now, and every time I have been impressed. They are friendly, efficient and knowledgable. It is such a relief.
Yesterday they told me that they DO consider me to be a candidate for surgery. I need to have another detailed scan, and more exploratory tests so it is not definite yet. However, if these further diagnostics go well I will be operated on mid September. A major operation. Complicated and challenging, but I feel so blessed to be even given the chance.
I am pretty shellshocked by the news. So is my family. I want to get excited but don't want to get my expectations up too high until I have had the tests which happen at the end of this month.
My advice to anyone out there who isn't happy with a first opinion on a medical matter, take all your courage in your hands and ask for another opinion. Another pair of eyes. I am so glad I did.

Sunday, 15 August 2010

The trip to God's own country

We have been to the North East of England for a few days. We were staying with other half's family. We had a lovely time. The weather was pretty moody, but on Thursday it was pretty good so we went to the beach. This is Tynemouth beach and it is very near where I grew up in Tynemouth village.

We went paddling and here is a picture of teenager with his cousin.

We also went to see NUFC ( Newcastle united) at a training session. It was a free event and thousands turned up.

Teenager got his very first season ticket. This means he can go to every home match. He has been over to Newcastle on the train with his friend, so he is hoping to go to lots of matches.

There was a first team player signing session and teenager got lots of autographs and photos, including this one with new signing Sol Campbell.
I love living in the Lake District and can't imagine every moving from such a beautiful place. I am always so happy to be back and inspired every day by the beauty and peace. But Newcastle will always be home.

Sunday, 8 August 2010

Two great books

My good friend Ann has lent me these books. I have read them both. They are excellent and I found them inspirational. The sort of books you can't put down. Has anyone read them? Let me know your thoughts if you have.
Since I stopped working I have started to read voraciously again. I am really enjoying it. I would love to hear about any books that you have enjoyed and would recommend.

Sunday, 1 August 2010

Regrets.... I have a few....

There is nothing more sobering than sorting out pension paperwork and realising you probably won't be around to take advantage of all that saving up and sensible planning. It makes me think- so what is all about? Life.
As you can see I am in philosophical mood today.
We have been burning old financial paperwork and filing important stuff away. I found a large box of photos and started sorting them out and labelling them.
There are some wonderful ones and I can wait to start scanning so I can start posting a few.
Everything from me at sixteen, college shots, shots of our engagement and teenager as a teeny boy. Holidays, parties, nativity plays and weddings. Where does the time go?
All over in what seems like the blink of an eye. And so much change right in front of my eyes: people who have moved away, people who have died, people who we don't see anymore, people I can hardly remember, people who have divorced, people who have re-married. Fascinating.
And all those different haircuts, and fashions... and remembering how I felt and what I was doing at each stage of my life. What was important, what motivated me, hopes and fears. Memories captured on paper, bringing back lots of different emotions.
It makes me realise what a great life I have had. I have made mistakes and have taken wrong turns, but perhaps these things have made me what I am today. Perhaps they were all part of learning lessons.
The bad things seem miniscule and irrelevant to me now. They are firmly in perspective now. In fact, my main regret is that I worried as much as I did.